Make It Work

Sep 27, 2019

I’d like to formally say that whatever you end up with in terms of how your body looks during and after you’ve grown and birthed a tiny human (or endured miscarriages and loss), is just 95% genetics and pre-programmed systemic stuff.  I’m talking about your stretch marks, your belly, your boobs, your butt, and all the other things in this arena.  The remaining 4.5% goes to luck.  And 0.5% goes to effort.  

Now, that’s not the story we are told as women, right?  Right.  We are told verbally and non-verbally that 95% is effort (remaining 5% hiring a night nurse).  And we believe it.  We gobble up this bullshit fake statistic and convince ourselves that we will eat "clean" (ugh), drink green smoothies, and exercise just exactly right such that we will somehow control genetics and make ourselves glossy pregnant and postpartum goddesses, looking nothing like our mothers and...

Continue Reading...

Slump Buster

Aug 29, 2019

Bleh.  I really did convince myself with the third kiddo that THIS TIME I’d not get so gross afterwards.  Like, I’d shower at least and when I didn’t, I’d still manage to appear messy, but cute.  Tired, but sweet.  Grungy, but sexy.

Yeah.  Um.  No.

I’d blame Instagram for all the whitewashed pictures of new mommas, tousled hair and fresh faces.  Some of them even have six packs under sweatshirts.  I mean.  BUT, why did I even look at these images?  Why did I even convince myself that this was a good idea?  Oh, yeah ... now I remember ... Because procreation and survival of the species absolutely depends on maternal amnesia. 

As much as I’d like to say, as the founder a company completely dedicated to function over appearance, that I care more about function over appearance, this isn’t entirely what has happened.  There’s this slippery, slithering thing in my deep...

Continue Reading...

Back to Basics

Jul 30, 2019

I rented a SNOO the other night, in a desperate, sleep-deprived haze. You can thank the internet for that and the never-ending dungeon maze that is the search phrase “my baby only sleeps on my chest.”
 
Within that maze was a taunting beacon of hope, the SNOO, developed by none other than Dr. Harvey Karp of The Happiest Baby on the Block. What is it? Oh, just basically a ridiculously expensive but impressively well-designed bassinet that claims to teach your baby independent sleep within weeks.
 
I know. I did that. Sleep deprivation and the internet are not a promising pair - unless you’re the inventor of genius bassinets and other trinkets.
 
In any case, the SNOO arrived and I read through all the material excitedly and, once my hands were free of a nursing/crying/napping babe, I put that thing together. A few clicks, a WiFi connection, a cute little swaddle blanket that gets everything all snuggly.
 
I’ll cut to...
Continue Reading...

Tune In

Jun 26, 2019

I always thought the book Eat, Pray, Love ought to be rewritten for regular humans and instead be called, Eat, Shit, Shower.  Because, let’s just be real here:  Most days, if I get those three things done, that I consider myself spiritually whole - forget Bali and Italy and Silent Retreats.

Don’t get me wrong, Elizabeth Gilbert’s book was incredibly inspiring to me when I first read it and I’m confident there is a ton of wisdom in there that I have yet to appreciate.   In fact, the scene in which she sits on the bathroom floor and decides to REALLY listen to herself in regards to her crumbling marriage was hugely helpful during my own divorce.  BUT, I had to pull myself away from the temptation she lent me to leave my entire life, run for the hills, and live in silent and divine communion with the natural world. 

You see, as moms and as partners, we can’t often do that.  We can’t afford it in any sort of way, can we?...

Continue Reading...

Forever Changed

May 29, 2019

Quilt and beautiful bee made by MommaStrong crafters!

 

The most common comment I get these days, by strangers or friends, is “You must be so ready to be done being pregnant!” And I know I look uncomfortable and I certainly know my belly appears to be an engineering feat (it is), but whenever I get asked that, my internal response is always "NOOOOOOOOOOO, I am not done!"

Don’t get me wrong, I am endlessly excited to meet this little person.  Endlessly.  We have already been through so much together and I’ve had the distinct benefit of enjoying a pain-free, anxiety-free pregnancy (thank you MommaStrong).  And, because of that, I feel that I’ve been present enough for the last 9 months to really get to know her and to get to know myself as a mom more than ever before.  I understand now why having kids in your late 30s is actually such a divine experience.  I feel integrated and whole for the first time in my life, like...

Continue Reading...

Don't Go It Alone

Apr 19, 2019

I will admit that for much of my life, I really thought the goal was to be as independent as possible.  Asking for help, getting help, or even needing help felt like things that violated the code of Grown Up.  And seven years ago, when I first started MommaStrong, you would have found series of self-help and business books near my bedside table all about how to “go it alone” and to “never give up.” 

I’m happy to report that that experiment failed miserably.  Trying to go it alone was the dumbest idea I ever had and left me at the hands of someone who ought not have been steering the ship all by her lonesome - MYSELF.  I made epic mistakes in life and in motherhood and in business that would have never ever happened had I done one important thing:  Run it by another grown up first. 

Who could have blamed me, though?  I don’t know about you, but this “independent success” value system wasn’t...

Continue Reading...

Exercise as a Right, not a Luxury

Mar 29, 2019

I’m 38 years old and 28 weeks pregnant.  After my last two pregnancies, I swore I would never get pregnant again, much less endure the postpartum experience, much less raise more little people.  That was partly because of how motherhood had felt to my body and to my nervous system.  In one word, it felt:  Harrowing.  Overwhelming.  Painful.  Stunting.  Paralyzing.  Overstimulating. 

Ok, that was more than one word. 

That was my reality though.  I spent both pregnancies in states of panic, convinced that everything around me was harming my baby and that my anxiety about everything harming my baby was going to cause more to harm to my baby.  I dipped out of life as much as I could, obsessed over tiny little things, and just agreed to get through the nine (ten) months alive.  Every time I went to the doctor - which, hello, when you’re pregnant is like allllll the time - I have a full blown panic attack...

Continue Reading...

Swerve

Feb 22, 2019

Tight equals strong, right?

Right?

Wrong.

That is just not true when it comes to the most important muscle groups in the female body:  Your pelvic floor.  In fact, a too toned and too tight pelvic floor is actually a very, very weak and vulnerable pelvic floor.  I would say that most, if not all, of the women who come to me for incontinence, prolapse, diastasis recti, back pain, and so many other issues are there because they have hypertonicity in their pelvic floor.  This basically means that they’ve been kegeling the bejeezus out of their hoohas in an effort to tighten things up down there and instead of making things better, they’ve made things worse.

Along with that, traditional ways of strengthening our bodies and holding our bodies all lead to hypertonicity as well.  So, let’s say you enjoyed decades of Pilates classes and boot camps and you kept on squeezing when they said squeeze and then you felt the burn, well … I hate to...

Continue Reading...

Celebrate Growth

Jan 28, 2019

Ever since I was a kid, there was one main thing I thought to be true about life:  Work hard so that you can get “there.”  In fact, if I were to be honest, I would say that drudgery, determination, and deprivation were core values to what I thought was the meaning of life.  I believed - and was told through coaches and teachers and every grown up around me - that if I put my nose to the ground for as long as I could, that it would pay off.

There was no one around me saying, slow down, sweet girl.  Take a deep breath and take a load off.  And I don’t remember that being modeled in front of me in any real way, and if it were it was immediately deemed as lazy or entitled.  By middle school, I was doing competitive kayaking at 4:30am, followed by a full day of school in which "straight As" was the only goal, followed by at least 3 hours of ballet class, followed by a quick dinner, followed by homework, followed by falling asleep in my...

Continue Reading...

Your Right to Rest

Dec 26, 2018

I’ve learned a lot in the 6.5 years I’ve been at it here with MommaStrong.  I’ve learned that mothers are the most tough of all humans.  I’ve learned that our society neglects the female body.  I’ve learned that everyone has crappy posture.  I’ve learned that a lot of women pee on themselves and it took until 2018 to really start talking about that.  I’ve learned that your butt muscles matter more than your core.  I’ve learned that showing up every day for exercise is actually possible and entirely brilliant.  I’ve learned that you can’t do anything alone.  I’ve learned that groups of women are literally the most healing quality of modern civilization.

And I’ve also learned that mothers are tired as fuck. 

Tired.  T-I-R-E-D. 

I get tons of emails from incredible women all around the world and, I kid you not, the main underlying theme in them all is:  ...

Continue Reading...
1 2
Close

50% Complete

Two Step

Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipiscing elit, sed do eiusmod tempor incididunt ut labore et dolore magna aliqua.